Are Your Secrets Weighing You Down? The things we carry….

As non-adversarial divorce professionals, we hold so much. Stories. Emotions. Tension. Silence. And we do it well—quietly, respectfully, professionally.

But have you ever noticed how heavy it can get?

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the secrets we carry. Not just client confidentiality—that part we’ve trained for. But the deeper kind. The unspoken worries. The emotional residue of high-conflict negotiations. The lingering questions or regrets from a case that never quite felt “finished.”

We're taught to withhold and protect. Over time, this conditioning becomes reflexive. Even when we’re off the clock, we may hesitate to speak honestly with friends or loved ones. Even when something stirs within us, we don’t say it. We tuck it away.

But where does it go?

The Cost of Holding It All In

Those unspoken thoughts don’t vanish.
They swirl beneath the surface—interrupting our sleep, clouding our peace, echoing in quiet moments. They can leave us anxious, disconnected, even burnt out.

Have you ever found yourself thinking and rethinking something you never said aloud? A small comment you wanted to make, but didn’t? A story you wanted to share, but couldn’t find the permission?

We all do it. But it adds up.

What’s Yours to Hold, and What Isn’t?

Part of our healing—our sustainability—comes from learning to tell the difference between what’s ours to carry, and what isn’t. We need boundaries of the mind, not just of the calendar. We need to know when to lay something down.

And just as importantly, we need safe, compassionate spaces to explore what we’re carrying. Places where we can say the thing. Ask the question. Name the feeling.
Not to have it fixed—but simply to be heard.

A Place to Let the Weight Go

This is your gentle reminder that it’s okay to speak, okay to feel, and more than okay to need a space to do both.

Creating room for reflection, connection, and self-compassion isn’t indulgent. It’s essential. We do deeply meaningful work—and we deserve the same care we provide to others.

We need a comfortable, safe space to speak - to give these thoughts their due consideration and to acknowledge their impact. A space to be human, not just professional. A space to practice self-compassion and acceptance. A space to feel lighter.